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Monday, June 4, 2007Leaving (Las) Charleston
Yesterday Mikah and I ended our trip to Charleston, SC. I figured all my loyal readers would want to read about our time spent in the airport.
The Charleston airport is kind of junky. It is very small. It only has 2 concourses, and each of those have 5 gates. So a total of 10 gates. CVG has 42,000 gates. I belive Atlanta has 1 million gates. I've not been there though.
So we got to the airport and pulled our rental car into the rental car lot. Yes, the singular rental car lot. They fit every company in one lot, probably 300 cars or something. Very small.
Then we went through the check in system, and made our way over to our gate, A4. It was difficult to find, because it was not labeled very well. Anyway, I went to the restaurant to grab some lunch. I got a mini-pizza and a fountain drink. Being an airport, it cost me $32.13 + a pint of my blood. I went to fill up my drink and they were all out. Every button I pressed just spit out carbonated water. I went back to inform the lady of the error. She was not pleased. You see, "I am here all by myself today. It is really hard for me to get everything done that needs to get done." Then she stared at me. ummm...what does she want me to do? Go in the back and do it myself? Tell her to forget about it...just keep my money? I decided on option 3: wait for her to do something. She angrily blew air our of her nose (sanitary!!) and went to the back. By the way - my dog does the same thing when he is upset at something. But he is a DOG! So she comes back and says, "there...you can go get your drink now." Like I am the one who caused the problem. You know...I don't think I experienced any "Southern Charm" while I was down there. Maybe I give off a vibe. I guess I figured Mikah's vibe would cancel out my bad ones. Apparently not.
So I went back to my seat to eat my gross pizza and drink my gross drink. Luckily I got to hear about some guy's plans for that night as he discussed it with everyone he called. It seems Loud Phone Guy is on his way to Boston soon after his 21st birthday and he plans to "tear it up." Whatever that means. He called no less than 3 people asking them what they were doing tonight. "Dude...what's up...what are we doing tonight? What? No...come on? Dude...we've got to tear it up! You only turn 21 once! (editors note: but what about the rest of your life? It's not like you are only allowed to tear it up on your 21st birthday) Yeah dude...we are going out big. Alright...I'll call you when I get in. Peace." LPG proceeded to make this same call 2 more times. I hope he gets free weekends on his cell phone. I also hope no one on the plane beat him senseless for being an obnoxious jerk. That said...I also hope he was successful at tearing it up.
Eventually we got on the plane and found our seats. Back row right by the toilet! Hurray!! After our bumpy flight home we got back to Cincy and walked through a real airport. Not some 3rd class tiny airport. Charleston didn't even have LCD monitors showing where each gate was headed. I figured that was required now. Apparently not. I also saw a cart pulling luggage headed for a plane and when the driver turned, someone's golf clubs came tumbling off the cart. Apparently nobody noticed a golf club carrier rolling around the tarmac. That golfer is not going to be pleased when he gets to his favorite golf course in the whole world to play a round and his clubs didn't make it. Also, they probably got run over by a plane.
Anyway...now the trip is over and we are headed back to real life.
It's good to be home.