Thursday, January 17, 2008

Mike Brown & The Bengals

I have a question...am I a sucker? Now, if you asked me that without any context, I'd say, "of course not!". Then I'd pout and turn my back on you and refuse to speak. Also, sometimes I tend to overreact. But if you ask it in the context of Bengals fandom...and I were answering honestly...I would have to say yes. Right? I mean, aren't all Bengals fans suckers?

Mike Brown said the other day that he doesn't care what other teams choose to do, or how to spend their resources. The Bengals are their own team and they will continue to use their own strategy. This is an awesome quote, because if you read between the lines...this is what it says:

Hi. I'm Mike Brown. I own the Bengals. We have had 1 winning season since 1989. We have not won a playoff game since 1989. We are literally one of the worst professional sports franchises in history. And yet...you continue to give me your money. You paid for my pretty stadium. You let me control the lease for any potential "Banks" project. You buy tickets to every home game. You buy merchandise. And all the while...I refuse to put a good team on the field. I refuse to hire a general manager (like all other successful teams). I refuse to hire more scouts (like all other successful teams). Basically...I have totally owned you (pwned!!!). I am so confident in my ability to rake you over the coals...that I will actually, audibly say that what we are doing is working just fine. Everything is perfect! See...see how confident I am? I am going to say that while raising ticket prices. Which you will all buy!!! hahahahahahahaha!!!!!!

What a scam artist. I heard an interesting quote that someone brought up while discussing this topic. It's from Winston Churchill...who I believe was an English horse jockey in the 1940's who said a lot of cool quotes. That's why the racetrack is called Churchill Downs. Anyway...he had an interesting quote:

However beautiful the strategy, you should occasionally look at the results.

What a wonderful sentiment. Maybe Mike Brown should spend more time reading horse jockey history and less time being a total tool.

(update: Apparently Winston Churchill was King of England during World War II. His quote is still valid)

(update to the update: Now I hear, apparently, that Churchill was not the King, but Prime Minister. Which sounds delicious right now.)



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Labels: Cincinnati Bengals, Mike Brown, Winston Churchill

Posted by Adam Wilson :: 1:23 PM :: 1 comments

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